Thursday, February 17, 2011

Run Over a Mongoose

Well, it all started out with a problem:
There were rats in the sugar cane.
It was drivin' the Lymans and the Shipmans and the Bishops
And the Brewers and the Doles insane
So they sent off for a little creature
That had made itself a fearsome name,
So the mongoose came from India to a place were no snakes came,
But the rats hide out all day,,
And the mongoose sleeps all night
And that was the little flaw in the master plan, yeah,
So you better run over a mongoose if you can.

Well, it's faster than a snake with a temper,
And it's meaner than a wild boor hog,
It eats apapanes, amakihis, ios, o'os, nenes and
Occasional cats and dogs.
And it breeds like a rabbit in springtime,
And the springtime is always at hand,
And it travels with its mama, papa, tutu, sistah, brah,
And every hungry relative it can.
But the rats hide out all night,
And the mongoose sleeps all day,
And that was the little flaw in the master plan, yeah,
So you better run over a mongoose if you can.

Well the day surely will be comin'
When the native birds all are gone,
then you better hide your fighting cocks
And keep your poodles under locks
And keep your baby off the lawn,
'Cause the rats hide out all day,
And the mongoose sleeps all night,
And the snakes are sadly lackin' so you got face the fact that
Here the only enemy is man,
So you better run over a mongoose,
Don't you ever, ever brake for a mongoose, yeah,
You'd better run over a mongoose
If you can.

Proud Farmer Blues

Well I've
got my farm
And I
grow my food
and I've
got my baby
but my
baby needs shoes
and I
can't grow shoes
I've got
no cash cows
and I've
got no cash
cause I'm
too damn proud
but I've
got the proud farmer,
Proud farmer blues!

We've got
crop rotations
we've got
contoured rows
and our
garden's organic
and our
food is slow,
we've got
cows and chickens
we've got
trees and hay,
we've got
a great big mortgage
that we
just can't pay
so we've
got those proud farmer,
proud farmer blues!

Well you've
got four tractors
you've got
three combines
you've got
three thousand acres
but you
still want mine
And you've
had no pride
since when
you were born,
But you've
got Federal subsidies to
grow your corn,
And all we've
got is those proud farmer
Proud farmer blues!

Well you've
got no fencerows in be-
tween your fields
and you've
got no wildlife
but you've
got great yields
and you've
got some soil
that's half
washed away
but you've
got fertilizer
that still
makes it all pay,
And all we've
got is those proud farmer,
Proud farmer blues!

They've got
corn fed burgers,
corn oil
for their fries
and high
fructose corn syrup
for their
thunder thighs
And their
cars have gas tanks
spiked with
ethanol
and they
let our taxes -
subsidize it all!
And all we've
got is those proud farmer,
Proud farmer blues!

Well we've
got three children
but they've
gone away
Cause they've
left for college
for their
MBAs
And they
think it's lovely
but they
couldn't stay
'cause they
know that family
farming
just don't pay
Leaving us
with our proud farmer,
Proud farmer blues!